are these all just going to end up being I’m Tired posts

i tried again to edit that other post i was working on last week, but i still can’t really get it right. and i don’t have the energy to totally revamp it right now, so it will just have to wait or maybe it will languish in my drafts forever, i don’t know.

this past week’s amount of socializing probably accounts for about 60% of the socializing i’ve done during the pandemic. it was a lot for this lil introvert, but wow do i love making people laugh and boy do i love laughing. i mean, don’t get me wrong, i make myself laugh all the time when i’m alone. but it’s not the same.

i genuinely had a great time at all of the social events i attended this week, but i’ve also been thinking a lot about the science behind the “fake it til you make it” concept as it relates to psychology. like how smiling or laughing even if it’s not how you’re feeling actually translates to your brain making happy chemicals or something. i’m butchering this because my brain is already asleep but you get it, right?

sometimes the social pressure to act happy and stress-free is actually a good thing. sometimes it’s just what my brain needs; other times it’s a convenient mask. the word “mask” has really taken on a whole new weight these days. hm. ok. let’s end this before my body falls asleep, too.